Today is the day...

crayon_ashes @ 2007-06-13T18:53:00

2007-06-14T01:53:49Z

oh god

pms + entire box of cookies sitting beside you= BAD

Boys.

2007-05-22T06:16:24Z

GO AWAY BOYS. God. Just, like, LEAVE for a few days. Please. ALL OF YOU. JUST GO.
I can't stand having to deal with any more boy drama.
Too bad I don't like girls much either.
Sarah's going to whisk me to neverland, luckily. We're going to have fairy wings.

This weekend has been pretty amazing though, I admit.
Minus the boy stuff.
*glowers*

crayon_ashes @ 2007-04-20T22:56:00

2007-04-21T06:55:23Z

RIP beautiful anna banana
:'( x 100

hospital update

2007-04-15T06:28:28Z

i finally came home from the hospital today. well i ended up staying a lot longer cause i'm so damn sick. and now i have no feeling on the end of my tongue and i dont know if i'm ever going to get it back. they might have cut a nerve or something. bloody fantastic. i've never been in so much pain in my life. thank god for painkillers. also thank god for people that are so kind to call asking about me and bring flowers and wish me well, it makes a world of difference. my parents have been looking after me, and daniel has been the most wonderful sweetheart, although i know he's antsy for me to get better :) i'm a little surprised at some of my friends for not even emailing to see how i am, but such is life. i'm thankful for the ones who do care. aimee is finally home and i miss her loads and i cant wait to see her. i also cant wait to eat steak. no more jello for me, please. blagh.

Hospital!

2007-04-12T06:52:32Z

Surgery tomorrow morning. Getting me tonsils out.
Should be a week of hell.
See you all in awhile.

i love the sunshine

2007-04-01T03:59:41Z

I had fun today!

Nickelback - If Everyone Cared

2007-03-16T05:24:09Z

This is coming from someone who usually hates Nickelback a lottt.

But they just won me over with this video.

see ya suckerrrrssss

2007-03-09T20:11:38Z

I QUIT I QUIT MUAHHAHA TAKE THAT YOU STUPID BOSS EEEEEEEE I QUIT I QUIT I'M FOREVER FREE FROM THAT TERRIBLE JOB YAYAYAYAYAYYA I QUIIIIIIIIITTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Upside-down.

2007-02-28T23:17:42Z

Fights are horrible. Jesus, I hate fighting.
Sneezing and then accidently biting your tongue sucks.
And why the fuck is it snowing.

crayon_ashes @ 2007-02-23T02:14:00

2007-02-23T10:16:47Z

I feel like running away to a cabin with a bunch of friends, and spending lazy days swimming and laughing and taking stupid pictures.

crayon_ashes @ 2006-12-17T21:11:00

2006-12-18T05:11:02Z

:)
I don't care if I'm lame.

After getting nearly no sleep last night, I'm going out with Courtney to a movie right now. Skillzzz.

crayon_ashes @ 2006-11-26T22:10:00

2006-11-27T06:10:59Z

I LOVE LOVE LOVE THIS SONG. Ask and I'll send it to you. So catchy I'm going insane. I want to play DDR to it so bad.

I get to play in the snow tomorrow!

Hospital.

2006-11-24T08:23:05Z

Just heads up, I'm really sick and had to go to the emergency room today. I won't be around or talking to anyone for the next while.
I need sleep, and my boy :(
Details later.

I'm such a girl sometimes.

2006-11-14T23:35:14Z

MY CHESNUTS DIDN'T WORRRKK!!! EVEN THOUGH I HAVE LIKE 20 OF THEM TUCKED EVERYWHERE IN MY ROOM
I JUST FOUND A SPIDER THAT HAD CRAWLED INTO MY SHIRT
AND IT'S HAIRY AND GROSS
AND I CANT STOP SCREAMING
AND I KNOW IT'S RIDICULOUS
BUT AHHHHHHHHHHHHH

crayon_ashes @ 2006-10-22T20:52:00

2006-10-23T03:53:14Z

Wow. I actually kind of despise my journal. I just read through a whole bunch of my entries, and hate it. It's interesting, all the private entries represent me far more than friends only entries, let alone public. I hate how vague I am on this thing, and how much of a fucking ditzy imbecile I come across as. I guess it's hard when you know anyone and everyone can (and possibly will) read it, and nothing's going to change that. I don't think I could get used to writing so openly about my personal life on here. I really don't, because it's just that - personal. I'm sorry this journal doesnt reflect me though, especially since I've had it for a few years. I'll make this entry public just for the hell of it.

I'm randomly becoming better friends with Emily (Fabian's girlfriend). She is hilarious and such a sweetheart and so much fun to be around. In fact, I'm really enjoying getting to know everyone at school, they're all just way more open, funnier, smarter and interesting.. I can't get over how much better I'm doing than last year. It helps when I don't have family members dying, when I'm not losing a best friend, when I'm not sick, when I don't have horrible classes and teacher feuds, and when I dont have a constant nagging general anxiety, among a thwack of other things. And most of all, it helps when I don't have a pathological lying abusive boyfriend. God, I was so fucked up last year. I am SO glad it isn't repeating itself and I'm much happier.

Rowing regattas are absolutely brilliant. I had one this weekend. My boats did awful (we're talking boat collisions, seats falling off, etc etc) and I felt like such a letdown and disappointment, especially to Dylan, who I know pours his heart and soul into rowing and it matters so much to him. I would kill to do awesomely in a race and see the look on his face. But other than that, I had so much fun just hanging around with everyone and coming up with endless antics with Connor. We never cease to amuse each other, honestly. That kid makes my life. His boat came second overall and I was just plain ecstatic, with a smile plastered on my face.

I hate endings and refuse to do them properly. Maybe I'm just exhausted and grumpy and need to go to sleep. I'm proud of myself for making a public post that wasn't all fun and games. It's a start I guess, I dont know. I still feel weird.

June Pictures

2006-10-10T05:00:39Z

Okay, okay. I know. Pictures from June. But everyone knows I'm late for everything.
More coming from July and August soon.

These are back from when me and Katz used to hang out pretty much all day every day together, since he lived right around the corner.

Katz tries to run away from me.

So I met a kitty friend.

Obviously I conquer and find him.

Oh, summer.

OMG SHORT HAIR. I kind of miss it.

I had, um, some issues. Getting stuck.

Katz didn't do much better.

We're cool and watch a lot of sunrises and sunsets.

crayon_ashes @ 2006-09-28T17:15:00

2006-09-29T00:16:17Z

happy birthday hilary.

crayon_ashes @ 2006-09-20T01:10:00

2006-09-20T08:10:57Z

goodbye summer.

Dangerous.

2006-09-14T00:12:43Z

I am extremely addicted to polka dots.

I LOVE THIS THING!

2006-09-12T03:19:45Z

Create your own! Originally Written By ga_woo, Hosted and ReWritten by darkman424

Ben.

2006-09-03T18:34:53Z

Eff. I really need to get ahold of Ben (Brant) asap.
Crapola.
Anyone randomly have his number?
It would save my life a bit. AS IN A LOT.
Helllllllp!

Edit: Mission accomplished :) Never mind!

Make a Difference.

2006-08-04T07:35:25Z

I had such an amazing night tonight, which turned out to be nothing like I had in mind. Maybe it wasn't jam-packed with fun or anything, but I couldn't have asked for anything better.

I mostly volunteer for big concerts at Open Air, but tonight I was strangely signed up for a movie night (Pink Floyd "The Wall") where every Thursday they show a screening of a movie with free popcorn, and it costs 5 bucks. In any case, I show up and apparently I was there an hour ahead of when I was needed (and I didn't even end up being needed). Great. I slapped on my happy-anything-goes face and just kind of hopped about the group of cranky coordinators, seeing if anything needed to be done. I found my niche up front with three kind middle-aged people. They were very welcoming and we joked around lots, so I decided to stick around with them. The night moved on, and I ended up being enlightened by a guy named Burt. He is such a jolly man, but incredibly sweet and friendly too. I'm really happy I was given the opportunity to sit through and talk with him for a few hours.

Anyways, that's not the part that matters. It's the homeless people that made a difference. Sure, there were lots of odd characters with mental disorders and addictions wandering around, but although they were amusing and I liked talking to them, nothing struck me as out of the ordinary. One group of four guys, however, caught my interest. There was one, who was kind of cocky, albeit friendly, and tried to get in with a 2 for 1 coupon or something and none of us really understood cause we hadn't seen them before or whatever, so he kiddingly said he'd send his three agents to deal with it and left. He struck my interest immediately. I absolutely loved him. He had this sort of sly and clever wit about him that you don't normally find. I could tell the other volunteers didn't take a notice and weren't going to do anything further, so I stepped up and went outside the gate to sort it out. I won't bore you with details, but basically I became friends with two of these guys over the course of the night by sticking up for them and helping them out. There was the 'cocky' one who had been all demanding and frusterated earlier (he kindly apologized to me after), and this other really sweet one who was incredibly thankful and friendly and wanted to make sure everything was okay. He stuck up for me when some other guy was getting annoyed at me, and I stuck up for him when the Open Air people were being anal. I was annoyed that I hadn't introduced myself and learned their names (they just called me 'the pretty girl in the blue shirt'. I don't know how to convince you, but just trust me when I say it wasn't creepy whatsover. they meant it kindly) so when I was done, I rode by the back on my bike to say bye... but the police were there and someone was lying on the ground passed out and I'm praying it wasn't one of them. Please let them be okay :(

One other homeless guy brought a coupon and thought he could get in for free. He wasn't really allowed, and went on a speel about how he doesnt have that kind of money, and neither does his friend, and it shouldn't be a big deal for him to come in, etc etc something like that. I completely understood where he was coming from. The other volunteers basically brushed it off. I felt awful though. I felt like he should be allowed in. So when they said something about it, I just said "Well, he really does have a point.." Ugh. I hate it so much how people don't have respect for poor people and dismiss it. They're struggling so much with day-to-day life, why does it matter if we let a couple in to see a movie for god sakes. One of the volunteers came back to the table and I explained what happened and she said she would have let him in. I managed to convince the rest of them, so off I went outside the gates to find him. He was sitting down, and I walked up with a smile and said that after some convincing, he was allowed to come in. The look on his face was unforgettable. He had apparently been upset by the situation and was surprised we had agreed. He looked at me with this hurt face and sincerely apologized for making a scene, he hadn't meant to, and that he was embarrassed he was in that situation in the first place, and that he was really sorry. I talked with him for awhile and comforted him. I think he was just so happy that someone understood and took the time to listen and help out. He explained that he hadn't seen TV or movies for a long, long time and we both agreed it would be a nice treat. He was kind of ashamed to walk by the other volunteers, so I escorted him in.

This makes me want to do something. It's not right that these people get ignored and stepped on. That one homeless guy is a perfect example. He came across as angry and unapproachable when we first talked to him. Most people get offended by this and stick labels all over them and refuse to help out and assume they're terrible human beings. After some basic listening to his needs and trying to help, you discover he's a perfectly kind and humble man. Being homeless forces you into a situation you don't want to be in, and no wonder they can turn angry. People ignore them constantly and there is such a lack of help out there. They are literally fighting for their survival and it's like no one takes notice or cares. I hate that.

So what am I going to do? Well I'm trying to think of something. Tomorrow I might go down to some of those shelters, maybe the soup kitchens, and see if there's any volunteer work I can do. I understand that alot of behind the scenes stuff is helpful (like making packages at the Mustard Seed or something), but I don't want to be a part of that. I want to be talking and helping directly with street people. I might contact some of those street nurses or the rotary club and see what I can do. I know someplace delivers hot food to them. I'm determined to get out there and do something though and try to make a bit of a difference.

I just wish more people would sit down and talk with them. Even walk by, give a smile, and say hello (ie. recognition). It's amazing how much they appreciate even that, let alone listen to their story, or have a friendly conversation with them.

This ended up being quite a long-winded speel. Thank you for listening, I appreciate it.

(and by the way, happy birthday astrid!)

crayon_ashes @ 2006-07-11T21:33:00

2006-07-12T03:49:05Z

Photo-update! This is way overdue, dating all the way back to May, but that's okay. Better late than never. We begin the post with Katz and I acccompanying Mitchi to the beach on a cloudy rainy evening.

He's clearly going to take over the world with his spectacularness!

June came, and Jarryd, Katz and I all adventured to the Oak Bay Tea Party. I was deliberately trying to look awful, don't worry.

Jarryd and I went on the ferris wheel. YES, I screamed, okay? I have a fear of falling haha.

I spy with my little eyyyye... KATZ!

Then! This one random day at school, Nick, Katz, and Andrew decided to make a pool in the back of Nick's truck. COOLEST THING EVER. Obviously it was way more important than math, so I skipped out and accompanied them until Wheeler came yelling.

My math buddy.

A random rainy day with Connor.

Grad night! I took so few pictures. Mostly blurry boring ones from dinner.

Pretty Hannah!

Why do I have a picture of Trevor...? Uh. Whatever, Matty's in the pic, and he was lookin' fine that night.

The ambience was nice.

The only pic from wet grad, when me and Josie went wandering to find people. Apparently Hollie had a good one of me and Vince, so I'll post it once I get a chance. All in all, it was way too much fun and I wish we could do it again.

I met the fab Erik the last day of school (it's like a tradition of mine to meet one new person on the last day of each year)

We had matching hair (no he did not do his voluntarily)

The Hotness.

Lookin' good Ali.

One fun night, Jenn, Aimee, Molly, Jarryd, Thomas, Katz, Dayle and I all hung out. We went to Beacon Hill where they fabricated a story involving me, the cute guy Jason who works there, and gravy.

My friends don't appreciate cameras. Pfft.

Boring post, sorry. Better ones coming.

Happy Canada Day!

2006-07-02T01:04:29Z

YOU KNOW WHERE TO FIND US.

crayon_ashes @ 2006-06-30T04:12:00

2006-06-30T11:10:46Z

The sun is rising.
I can't decide whether to go to sleep, or stay up and watch it.
Damnit Cody (/anyone) why can't you be up? Hah.

4 minutes later... ME AND KATZ ARE GOING. Hurrah!